Tonight I was on Youtube watching a show and when it ended, for some reason, on the home screen was my face.....from 2012. How did THAT get there??? I was sitting next to my roommate Michael and he scrolled over to put it on, me being mortified grabbed that remote and turned it right back off! I thought I had deleted that thing!! Well, turns out i just put it on private so while i'm the only one that has access to it, I guess so does everyone else that watches our TV. But I digress.
When I was a senior in college, my last semester before graduating, I decided to make a documentary of my final semester. It's mainly boring, kinda sad, terrible camera work, and when I uploaded it to youtube it did this janky thing where it zooms in and out and shakes and moves around my little captions on the bottom.....the beginning is kinda hard to watch quite frankly. (Though you will never know!) It was 41 minutes long and not gonna lie, I was tearing up at the end!
I have the memory of a goldfish. Not 5 minutes ago Lauren was texting me about a TV series, I told her I would have to google it.....apparently it is a TV series we watched and enjoyed. Oops. There are too many TV shows!! If I can't even remember last week how am I supposed to remember 2012!! Much less the regular mundane moments in my day. And then I watch my videos. Oh my gosh that was me?? I want to hug my little 21 year old self. I never think about her, really. Most of the time any memories I might have float away to never be thought about again. Not for any particular reason, but because why would you?
Almost all of my videos on my youtube channel were uploaded around my college years. You know what was right next to my documentary? A 2013 year end review video. 7 minutes long. It is actually crazy to watch my 2012 video that ended right at my college graduation- so much hope and optimism and excitement of the unknown, followed by my next year - my first full year in LA. The contrast in the videos was astounding. If my 2012 self could watch that 2013 year end video she would've probably shed tears of joy. But this post isn't about that! Back to my bad memory.
I ALSO hadn't probably thought of nearly all the things that happened in the 2013 video since....well, probably 2013. But it was fun to go back and remember those memories existed. One tiny little clip in that video showed a flying clock on a string, to which I narrated - 'Time really does fly when you think about it' I have blinked and now that video is TEN YEARS OLD. TEN.
Now onto the post - lol. (jk. but actually) I know Facebook used to make those year end review videos for everyone around New Years and it was sweet but I mainly didn't want to jump on a bandwagon and do one for myself. Fair. Honestly, no one cares about your year in review, no offense. That being said - i'm doing years in review!!! lololol. I have so many memories I feel like are lost at sea and maybe it's time to go fishing and mount what I catch so I can go back and look at it every now and again. I know i'm going to lose the authenticity of the moment by going back and doing a year in review for 2014, but I hope I can somehow jump back into my 2014 mind and remember what was on my playlist, who I was. Life is such a rollercoaster man. We have so many chapters (if we are lucky) and what a joy it is to go back and re-read some of those chapters, ride through some of those corkscrews and loops. I don't want to forget where i've been, where i set out to go, or how far i've come. Yes yes, you've gotta live life in the present, but if you can created a little time capsule for yourself to go back and watch in 10 years time, maybe you'll remember to be proud of not only your accomplishments but the whole journey along the way. I think it's just another way to honor this life we've been given. Now, here I go to get my waders but don't make fun, because these videos are for future me.
