What does it matter?

It is only 12 o'clock, yet there has been an unavoidable theme to my day so far. Not anything that has really happened to me, but more outside forces that i've observed. I'll start from the beginning.

I'm walking to my first class and a song came up on my ipod, one that I really enjoy and have even quoted on my Facebook. As I was listening to the song, I heard a part of the song that I have never really payed attention to before; the part was as follows: "‎My comfort and my glory are shakin' when I see that my life's not a story about me. So stay humble, humble, humble." (As seen by my most recent Facebook status update) So upon returning to my apartment I decide to add that as my status and continue my day. Walking to my next class I hear another song on my ipod by Ben Rector called "Song For The Suburbs." If I could quote the whole song I would, but for the purpose of this post I guess I will just include the bridge and chorus, "Are we just running in the dark or living, are we just running in the dark or living? Cause I wanna live until I die, don't let the devil bury me alive, when my heart stops let me go home don't the let suburbs kill my heart and soul." After hearing that one I thought I should probably post that to Facebook as well, because lets face it, of course everyone cares about what music I post on Facebook, hahahah (that was a joke.) Anyway, so I arrive to class (African American History) and I can't help but notice what we were talking about tied into these songs a little. You see, this whole week we have been doing nothing but reading the book and talking about Invisible Man, and to set up a theme encountered in the book, we were talking about history and its roll in the past. What history is. Who writes it, what it means. And this all lead up to his point, (and I wish I could remember his exact quote because it was so funny, yet honest and he said what we might think is scary at the same time, but) that we are all doomed to obscurity. None of us (really) will live in history, be wrote about in the books. We will be forgotten...I mean, sure our family and friends will remember us for a short amount of time, but soon enough they will forget and the people that knew us will die too and that will be it, our lives just left in obscurity and nothingness (I mean, for the most part, I don't want to get all religious or start any debates up in here.)

So it got me thinking, what does it all matter? Really. And not only does our life not matter, but i'm reminded that our lives are short. So short, like a mist sprayed from a bottle (or whatever mist comes out of.) So why do people worry so much? Why do I worry so much. About my future, job, whatever. Shouldn't we just all strive to be happy and make others happy? Love. Do what you want to do, because in the end what really matters? It isn't like anyone will remember you anyway. Some might find this sad or depressing, but no one cares. (I mean, obviously people do and God loves you and whatnot...but in relation to the rest of the world and time and history, not so much.) So why would someone care if I got a tattoo, why do I care or have to have a job in the entertainment industry? So from now on, lets try not to worry so much. Especially on the things we can't control. God's got it all covered. I want to be happy, that's about it. Part of that happiness comes from others happiness, some of it comes from music, some of it comes from nature and photography, some of it comes from knowing God's love for me and serving Him, and some of it even comes from my hopes and aspirations to work in film (I find nothing wrong with that.) So whenever anyone asks me what I want to do after I graduate or for the summer or even next weekend, my answer is going to be, be happy. Whatever and where ever that might be. 

And for anyone interested in my two lovely songs, take a listen: "Stay Humble" Tyler James:

And "Song for the Suburbs" Ben Rector:

Blast From The Past- Xanga

For some reason, I ended up at my old blog spot, Xanga, today. If you aren't familiar with Xanga, it was like, the first social media site that was big with my friends. I don't even think Facebook had been invented yet and Myspace just wasn't good enough for my highly intellectual group of friends, haha ;) I apparently joined in 2005 when I was 15 and my last post was in 2008 i believe, but really only posted through 2007. Which was basically the chunk of my high school years. So, for a while today I was going back and reading all of my blog updates and the comments on them. It is so funny going back and looking at not only my posts but the comments on them as well. Sometimes I forget what life was like in high school, but after reading my blog I am reminded it was school, sports, and church, that's about it, haha. There was a lot of good times and good friendships though, and I kind of miss it. ...weeell. haha. But if you think my english/grammer/spelling is bad now, woah buddy just read what I was writting in high school! haha. Boy was I a terrible speller (and still am, but thank God for Google Chrome!) You know, I always thought it was weird how people would keep journals and stuff, but looking back Xanga pretty much was my journal. I wrote down my thoughts and what happened that day or week. Now I really enjoy going back and reading entries to see what exactly was going on in my life at that point in time. ...which is what i'm hoping I will be able to do with there here blog. I mean, I don't have that much meaningful stuff to say, and yea, most of the time it is just a mess but it's who i am. And I know that one day I will be able to look back on this blog and on this entry and be like, "oh amy..." So you know, I don't even care that no one reads this. I think it's something pretty cool to have, not only to keep me occupied when i'm bored but to have something that documents where I am right now at this point in my life. That being said, it is 8:30 and i still haven't had dinner so, I gotta go!! haha. Thanks for checking in, I hope everyone has a nice weekend! 

Oh, and if any of you are seriously bored enough and would care, here is my Xanga if you wanted to check it out in person. http://amylynn0002.xanga.com/ . 

The Smell of Home

You know those places and houses that have their own distinct smell? I remember growing up going over to my friends house (Savannah) and always knowing the smell of their house, I loved it. I know it sounds really weird, but even if she left some article of clothing (a jacket or something) in the locker room or in the classroom I, along with fellow students (I felt I should add that to sounds a little less of a creeper) would always be able to distinguish it was hers because of how it smelled. I never really thought my house had a smell and one day someone told me they liked how my house smelled, like it had a family smell...that scent was reserved for the Ergle household. I still couldn't really notice anything...until I left. After moving out, now every time I walk in the door for the first time during a break, that smell is there to welcome me home. It doesn't really last or standout as much during the rest of my stay, but that first greeting with home again always takes me back. You might be wondering why in the world I am writing about this now, but it isn't so far out of the blue, i promise. Here at school, I tend to wear a lot of the same things...i always pack and have more clothes than I actually need. So I pulled out a shirt that was kinda in the back of the drawer that I haven't worn yet for my p.j's and I smell my house. I can close my eyes, smell my shirt and it is just like I am walking in the door again for the first time after a long break. I just thought it was pretty funny how even though it has been a month and a half or so, the smell has still stayed. Well, I realized I haven't been updating as much recently and thought I could write about something other than my tv/music obsessions and my concerns about the future so, there ya go! ...I also thought this photo was funny of the welcome mat outside our house with the withering flowers. I'm pretty sure this photo was taken at least a couple of years ago but i wouldn't be surprised if that plant was still sitting around somewhere, haha. Hope everyone's had a good weekend! Thanks for reading.