Traffic Thoughts

So I have this problem where when i'm stuck in my car (and especially in traffic) I come up with good blog ideas and motivate myself to finally write an update, but then by the time I get home and get on my computer, I get lost and distracted on other social media websites and 2 months have gone by and I haven't even opened up my blog. So here I am finally dusting off this blog again, but only of course after I have completely forgotten today what I had come on here to write. (I'm great at just never getting to a point or talking about anything really....it's a wonder if anyone is even reading this or reads this blog at all, haha. Good for you. The patience.) So anyway, I digress.

Oh yes, so a year ago today. (Look, I for once remembered something!) I'm not sure if you have seen this on my facebook, but I have this app called Timehop and it shows you all your status updates from a year, 2 years, 3 years, etc, ago today. It is actually pretty cool and it's fun looking back on what I was up to a year ago today. So this plays a part of my story, but I will for now put it on hold while I continue. Just keep it in the back of your mind when I mention it later.

So i've been working on this movie called Blood of Redemption. (also another reason why I have yet to have the strength to update this here blog. Basically, when I am on a movie, don't expect much from me except a random amount of facebook updates when I am doing a lock-up) We finally wrapped last night and oh my gosh, this movie. So for this movie, I had the unfortunate job of working crafty since that was a paying position and a PA wasn't. (PA meaning production assistant and crafty being craft service, having food and drinks available for the crew in between mean times...just for some people that might not know.) So anyway, turns out being crafty is the absolute worst job you can get on a movie set and I am definitely not cut out for it. It is especially terrible when you are being way underfunded and half of your budget is going to drinks and ice. The thing about crafty is, you have to please everyone. Everyone always wants something or expects something from you, but sometimes YOU JUST DON'T HAVE THE BUDGET FOR THAT and people don't understand that. No one is ever happy because you can't produce what they want, you are always running out of food because you can only buy so much with the money you are given. If I never hear the phrase "do you have___" again, I will still have heard it more than I want to. I will stop ranting about crafty for a moment because in my desperation to escape people and soul sucking area known as crafty I would go and help the 2nd AD with some of her production stuff. This I think was one of the redeeming factors of the movie (if it had any at all) I made her and Aaron (who was Ket Set PA) put me to work as much as I could. I helped Stephenie (2nd AD) with her PR's (production reports) organized her paper work, helped with the daily time sheets, staple the maps to the call sheets, anything I could do really that would make me feel productive. I never really thought I would enjoy being a second AD because they are in the production office quite a bit, but after helping stephenie for this shoot, I realized it really isn't too terrible of a place if I ever do find myself in a position to work myself up to being a second AD. So anyway, now that I completely went off on another tangent of sorts.....

As much as I completely and utterly hated this movie at times (which I really did, this has probably been the most stressful project I have worked on) there were some good moments. I met some great people that made me laugh and I wouldn't mind working with again, I was able to learn how to do a production report, I was able to work with some other people i've worked with before again. Driving home from work, even on some of those days I felt defeated, I was reminded that even then, I would still much rather be doing this than what I was a year ago. Yesterday Annie, Edwin and I took a mad tour of downtown. We spent our day waaalking and walking, but having fun and enjoying each others company (and eating of course.) And it was either yesterday or the day before when Edwin had told me that he finally finished watching my little documentary I did of my senior year last year. He reminded me of the little voice over part I did at the end, where I mentioned looking forward to the new people I was going to meet wherever I ended up.....that that he and Aaron were indeed the new people I met! This is true. I am reminded daily of how far I have come in a year. Yesterdays status updates from a year ago today included the quotes: "It would be very nice to have a friend again. I would like that even more than a date" and "I don't know how much longer I can keep going without a friend. I used to be able to do it very easily, but that was before I knew what having a friend was like. It's much easier not knowing things sometimes."See a year ago today I was reading one of my all time favorite books, The Perks of Being A Wallflower and very much sympathizing with the main character. But I can't help but only look back and smile and think that even though this job kinda sucked for me, look at where I am today. I have found some truely great friends where I no longer feel the pain in those quotes. While I might get a little defeated, at the end of the day I am working on a movie in LA and at the end of the month it will be over and I will find my next project (hopefelly, if anyone is reading this and is in LA...i'm looking for work! haha)

So while I know this update has been the approximate length of a novel so far, it was one of my 'traffic thoughts.' How kinda sad my life was a year ago at this time (I mean, I had good times, don't get me wrong buuut...) and how grateful I am that in the middle of chaos and frustration, at least you have some good friends to share some memories with, and I wouldn't trade this time for anything.